The Youth Peer Educators were asked:
What was your coming out story or if someone came out to you, what was that like for you?
Do you have a story to share? If so, please do so!
When I was a sophomore in high school, I was in a dance company with a freshman girl I wasn’t particularly close to. I mentored her a bit, and in the company, we always had this “family dynamic” going on for every one of our members. That was the farthest extent of our relationship. One day, I was in the dance room and she comes up to me wanting to talk. First, she asks if we can talk in the corner, further away from the other members. Then, she asks if we can step outside the door. Once we get outside, she then asks if we can move even further away into the fields. At this point, I’m getting a little bit anxious and confused because she could have at least hinted at what she wanted to talk about with me. But I could sense she was holding in something important so I humored her.
In the fields, she slowly and awkwardly blurts out, “I think I’m gay.” My whole perspective on where I thought the conversation was going was redirected because I did not. See. That. Coming.
I think I replied with an, “Oh. Okay. That’s okay, that’s fine,” and a hug. I then proceeded to ask her if she told her parents, to which she replied that she told her sister, but not her parents. The fact that she didn’t tell her parents yet, but told her sister and ME first before anybody else raised another red flag to what she was going to say next. She told me that she was attracted to me and my personality, which I was flattered by, but she also thought that “I would understand.” I asked her what she meant by that and she thought I was a lesbian as well, because of the tomboyish way I dressed at the time even though you cannot tell a person’s sexual orientation by the way they dress. But in the end, I tried to let her down easy by being supportive and thanking her for trusting me enough to tell me – however, I didn’t return her feelings, because I just didn’t know her that well. Nevertheless, she was very gracious about it and said she understood, so we remained friends after that, through her times with a boyfriend (she had changed her mind about being a total Kinsey 6, apparently?), and through her times with a girlfriend. It was an interesting experience for me just because I didn’t even really talk to this girl, but she felt comfortable opening up to me – a near stranger. I think the key to our remaining friendship after that was the fact that I continually supported and encouraged her through her other relationships.
– G