The Youth Peer Educators were asked:
If you had a one night stand, what was that like and is there anything that you would do differently? Or what are some tips to give people to make sure they stay safe if they do have a one night stand.
One night stands can be unpredictable. You may just be out with friends not thinking that you would end up at a stranger’s apartment or that you would bring someone you barely know to your place. Just because you never know who might catch your eye at a party or club, just carry a condom with you just in case. If you don’t hook up with anyone, that’s fine, save the condom for another time.
– E
It was my “almost” one nightstand. I know. How do you have an “almost” one night stand? Well, it was awkward. There was lots of sly flirting, intent laced with vodka and beer. By the end of the night, it was me and him trying to figure each other out. There was lots of fumbling in the dark and I distinctly remember the sweet post-party-booze smell in the air and on his breath.
The thing is, both of us had not intended to hook up with each other or anyone that night. Things heated up rapidly, as we went from one room to the bathroom and finally to a couch. Before anything could happen, he admitted he did not have a condom. And in complete drunken honesty, I admitted: “I’m a virgin”. His response could have been to just stop, slow things down or in the opposite direction in a much worse fate. Yet, he was understanding and did not want to be my “first”. In the morning, with our friends during the post party breakfast, we promised to not make it awkward and no one found out.
Had either of us brought a condom, would we have done it? Maybe. Would I have been so honest? Most likely. But, luckily we both had the understanding of protecting ourselves. In any event, you never know what could happen. The right music, the right mood, the right drinks to get it going and you could find yourself in an unpredictable whirlwind of a situation.
Be prepared:
- Bring condoms for when the time arises.
- Bring cash in case you need a cab to bail.
- Be honest.
- Know what you want and what your terms are.
- If you don’t want to do something, you don’t have to.
– J
For a one night stand I would recommend always using a condom. If you do not want to have vaginal or anal sex with someone you barely know but you still want to get frisky, go to foreplay and/or oral sex. It is still satisfying and pleasing to both parties and has a low risk for HIV transmission.
– L